BOSTON, MA -- The day after Paul Wilson is scheduled for exploratory shoulder surgery, Eric Milton will also go under the knife.

Milton, who suffers no physical ailments and reports no pain, appears to be the victim of a mental block. The surgery Saturday will be on his brain.

“He tried to work through it. We put him through sensory deprivation, regression therapy, even hypnosis,” Dr. Timothy Kremchek, the Reds medical director said. “Seriously, we had him in the fetal position crying for mommy every single day. But he's hit a wall. Brain surgery is drastic, but he's hurting the team. We have to do what's best for the Reds organization: get Milton off the active roster.”

Because he's not sure what the surgery will uncover, Kremchek can't predict how long Milton will be out, but everyone is hoping it will be a while.

Kremchek will perform the surgery. He said it was the only option left.

“They certainly can't move him to the bullpen,” said Kremcheck.

Another great game today, and a lot more than usual to talk about, so let's get right to it.

Jason LaRue Bereavement
Apparently his grandfather passed away unexpectedly and he'll be out to be with his family. Our thoughts and best wishes go out to him and his loved ones.

I know from the search terms that lead to hits on RHM that there are a whole lot of other LaRue fans out there who would probably also like to send their condolences, but I wasn't able to find any contact information on The Official Site. The lack of easy access to an email or snail mail address for players is a beef I have with MLB that I fully intend to vent about at some more appropriate time. In the mean time, maybe the forums or mail straight to the stadium would be a passable solution for those of you who want to express your sympathy.

Austin Kearns To Louisville
When I heard that Austin Kearns was optioned to Louisville, I was surprised. Not because it was a shocking move, but because I hadn't thought of it first. This management has made some bad signings, mystifying on-field decisions, and poor clubhouse-decorating choices, but I've agreed with a whole lot of the player moves they've made this season.

I have no idea what Kearns must be thinking about now. He seems to be a particularly cool-tempered, level-headed guy, but I'm sure it stings something fierce and seems frighteningly drastic. I hope he'll take at face value the assurances that he's not up for immediate trade (though that might not look so bad about now) and make sincere use of this opportunity.

Kearns was freaking awesome out of spring training, and there's no reason to believe that he can't go beat up on some AAA pitchers for a while and come screaming back onto the scene. I'm confident enough about it, in fact, that I'm not even postponing my research for his Human League profile.

And In Their Places…
Dane Sardinha is coming up to fill in for LaRue until he's back, no earlier than Wednesday. Kenny Kelly will be filling in for Kearns. Kelly looked overmatched the one time I saw him play, but his numbers certainly indicate otherwise, so I'll be interested to see what he has to offer.

Day To Day
Ryan Freel and Wily Mo Peña were both out of the lineup again today and have both been listed as day-to-day, projected to be back soon. That would be all good if experience didn't tell us not to expect to see them again until sometime in August.

Finally, On To The Actual Game
When Ramón Ortiz gave up the three-run home run in the second inning, all I could think was “here we go again.” When he gave up the solo shot in the third inning, I was steaming with frustration. But when it was all said and done, you look back on it and see a guy who gave up a handful of hits and two homeruns to Sammy Sosa. That's hardly territory worn exclusively by poor performers.

It must have been gratifying for Ortiz to see both Baltimore leads immediately dashed. I know that it was gratifying for me finally to see this offense we've all been hearing so much about. Every single person contributed. On the suspicious side, Jacob Cruz was pinch-run for again, but I seem to be the only person bothered by that, so I'll move on to my last point, which is that…

Rich Aurilia Is Kicking Ass
Yeah, that's what I said. Wanna make something of it?

Hitting The Road
Next up: a three-game trip to Boston. The offense that has suddenly appeared the last couple days is going to need to be in full effect for Milton's start tomorrow. If nothing else, it'll be great water-cooler kiss-up opportunity for me as my boss is a BoSox fan (“My my, that David Ortiz really is quite the hitter, sir!”) Ought to be a good time.

Over at The Official Site, Anthony Castrovince, everyone's favorite Reds PR rep led off the story Notes: Pena, Freel nursing injuries with this, the best sentence of the season:

CINCINNATI -- Friday night was hard on the Reds' knees.

Personally, I would have been more likely to have just come out and said that they sucked. Unlike tonight when they scored early and often and Claussen rocked. w00t!

The opportunity to take the second consecutive series presents itself tomorrow. Let's not blow it.

Go Reds!

On the one-month birthday of Red Hot Mama, writers from all my favorite Reds sites had participated in the May round table that was posted in pieces all around the Reds' blogdom. I had scanned through, feeling wholly inadequate because I thought OPS was a stupid stat and I lacked any strong opinion about exactly how many weeks after his 30th birthday the Reds should tie up Dunn. So you can imagine my surprise to receive an invitation to the next one.

Fast forward one month: I've learned a lot, and I'm confident that I can hold my own with these guys; maybe even take them to task on some stuff. I'm getting psyched up to be witty, coquettish, wise, thoughtful, and an ambassador for all of woman-kind. I'm nervous. I'm pacing the room. I'm tying my hair in knots. But I pull myself together, get into the online forum, ready to wow everyone.

So now I invite you to guess what I did. Do you think I shocked everyone with my insights? Made everyone laugh so hard that they couldn't even type? Well, I'll tell you what I did: I broke the forum. My big chance to prove myself, and I broke the freakin' forum.

The forum couldn't handle the use of double-quotes, but my love affair with punctuation is so deeply entreanched that I used them without even realizing I'd done it and blew the darn thing up.

And oh the chaos! Reds bloggers everywhere were sent flying, spread-eagle, into cyberspace! If it hadn't been so gruesome, it almost would have been cool.

Since you see the transcript below, you probably have already figured out that the guys pulled together another solution in no time flat. They didn't even make fun of me for screwing everything up. They were WAY nicer than I would have been.

And though I was humbled at first, I soon got the sassy back out. So, without further ado, I am pleased to present part one of the June Reds Round Table. Links to the subsequent parts will appear below when the rest of those guys make them available.

Joel: Who wants to introduce themselves to the class first?

Blade: I'm the creation of a young boy:
http://www.redscuttingedge.com/a/2004/09/18-who_is_blade_stevens.html

Joel: Blade is a mystery wrapped in an enigma disguised behind a false moniker.

Joel: Hi, my name is Joel. I started as a blogger back in December and already I have to beat my fans off with a stick. I manage to be both adorable and witty at the same time, which drives the women nuts. I started writing at Great American Reds Blog, but I have since moved to the 5th most popular blog on the MVN network, Reds & Blues.

JDArney: Hi, JD Arney here. I started blogging about the Reds back in December of 2002 with Redsfaithful's Baseball Blog. Bought my own domain in February of 2004 (Reds Daily) and then moved to SportsBlogs and Red Reporter in February of 2005. I also coach high sports such as tennis and cross country and I go to school in pursuit of a political science degree. Also I'm getting married in August. And I like long walks on the … ok that's enough I'll let someone else go.

Red Hot Mama: JD - aren't you too young for all that stuff? You must be some sort of prodigy.

Joel: Thanks JD, how's the wedding planning coming? And is the future wife prepared for the fact that you are one of the 5 most important bloggers on the net? If you only count Reds blogs.

Blade: Sweet, I'm one of the five most important, too.

Joel: Uh, Blade, there are 6 Reds blogs…just sayin'.

Blade: Sweet, I'm one of the six most important, too.

JDArney: I'm 23, and the wedding planning is going pretty well. From what I hear. I try to stay out of it. Also my future-wife is blown away by my Reds blog. I think it's what attracted her in the first place.

Shawn: I'm Shawn. I have a wife and four kids. I have been teaching science (mostly physics and chemistry) at the high school and college levels for 15 years. I became a Reds fan when I was 8, during the 1972 pennant season, watching the team on TV. 40 games on WSAZ, Channel 3 out of Huntington, WV. My parents were kind enough to humor my youthful passions, and our family vacations in 1975 and 1976 included trips to Reds games. Good times. I've been a Reds fan since, blogging since 2002. Though if I were starting now, I probably wouldn't do a Reds blog. I only did it because no one else was at the time.

RHM: What would you do instead?

Shawn: I might not have gotten into blogging at all. I found out about blogs, saw that no one was doing a Reds one, and started the CR Blog. Now I have four…well, five actually.

Joel: Wow, I have a hard enough time trying to find time to write one post a day…I'm impressed.

Shawn: I don't post to the others every day.

JDArney: Yeah, I have a political site that's dead, i need to try to revive it.

Joel: But then, I'm a slow writer, so I mull over everything way too much before I post it…too much of a perfectionist, I guess.

Shawn: They are more historic and specific in nature, and don't require daily updating. Longer shelf life, as it were.

RHM: I can't believe that after a day of sitting in front of a computer and writing, I come home and write, but I do it. Might be different if I'd followed physics like you. Certainly would have been, actually, since I'd be a time-traveller by now.

Shawn: Well, it's not so much physics as education. I teach…that's really the only thing I've ever found that I can do that people will pay me to do. So I'm not an office drone, sitting at at computer all day.

RHM: Hey!

Joel: I hear you RHM, my wife can't understand how I can sit at a computer for so long after working at one all day.

RHM: What is it that you do, Joel?

Joel: I'm an IT guy. I work at Initech…I check bank software for the year 2000 switch…

Shawn: Still?

Joel: Nah, that's from Office Space, but I do hate my job and everyday is just slightly worse than the one before it…sad really.

JDArney: It's only fractions of a penny! That's not stealing … it's like the need a penny take a penny thing on the counter! Only hundreds of thousands of times.

Shawn: hahahahaha

Joel: Well, what do you want to talk about? How about this question….who is your all time favorite Reds bench player?

Shawn: Hmmmmmmm…maybe Terry Crowley.

JDArney: D.T. Cromer.

Shawn: He was usually good for a pinch hit.

Joel: I always liked Luis Quinones….that's fun to say. “Quin-yone-yes”

JDArney: D.T. … J.D. … it was love at first sight really.

Blade: Ed Armbrister. He was one of Sparky's boys.

Shawn: Yeah, but Ed was Sparky's pinch-bunter.

Joel: You're in love with that Big Red Machine, aren't you? Do you have BRM bed sheets?

Blade: Yes, and no. Only because I didn't know there was BRM bed sheets. I should check ebay.

Joel: I don't know, there's something kind of weird about sleeping with Joe Morgan right in your face.

Shawn: Hey, those are my childhood heroes, dude.

Joel: I know. I don't mind. I'm just a bit too young to have appreciated them.

Blade: I was four in 1975.

JDArney: I wish I'd been alive for that. 1990 is pretty much all I have.

Shawn: Ah, what you missed. I was 11 in 1975….that was the Golden Age of baseball for me.

Joel: I was -1 in 1975, if you believe in pre-existence. Oops, there I go philosophizing again.

JDArney: Hey I like this game, I was -6 in 1975 … -7 before July 6th.

RHM: My parents had not yet met in '75.

Joel: No way, you are not that young, are you? Er, I mean, aw forget it.

RHM: I'm younger than say, Casey, older than WMP.

Joel: Ah, that clears it up then.

Shawn: I'm older than any of them, but younger than Julio Franco.

RHM: Once I'm older than all the players, I'm not sure how that will affect my fandom.

Shawn: You'll be more maternal.

Blade: Eh, I'm getting there. I don't think it matters too much.

RHM: The other day I was in Dairy Queen when the Logansport High School baseball team came in, and I caught myself checking some of them out, so it may not change anything. In my defense, they were the oldest-looking 17-year olds I've ever seen.

Joel: Here's a harder question for you: who is your favorite CURRENT bench player….this does not include Freel and Wily Mo who should be starting.

Shawn: None of the above.

Joel: Aw, c'mon, you gotta choose one.

Shawn: Oh, shucks. Valentín then. There's only four to choose from: Valentín, Aurilia, Romano, L. Lopez.

RHM: Well, Javy *is* the Latin Love Machine.

JDArney: That's hard. Jacob Cruz, I guess. He seems to try hard.

Shawn: Oh, yeah, Cruz. I'll take him. We're down to 12 pitchers, I forgot. Cruz is the only one who really belongs on a big league roster.

Joel: I like Cruz too. He's one of the few guys on the team that seem half way competent.

JDArney: I've read that he takes extra BP, stuff like that, although that might just be because he's bored.

Blade: Cruz would be my choice as well.

Joel: Though, you've got to give props to Javier Valentín's mustache.

Blade: We know about your infatuation with his mustache.

Joel: Hey, if I could grow one like that, I would, but just for the weekends.

RHM: What's up with Cruz? Why hasn't he been running for himself? Something wrong with his legs?

Joel: I don't think so, I think it's just a case of Miley over-managing. Plus, I think DanO demands that Romano plays every game. 🙂

Shawn: Is that like mind over matter?

RHM: That doesn't explain why LLopez ran for him today, though.

Joel: Well, I guess if Luis Lopez is going to be on the roster, he should play occasionally, too.


Check out the rest:
Part II on Reds and Blues

Part III on Red Reporter

Part IV on The Cutting Edge

Part V on Shawn's Cincinnati Reds Blog

A big, big win tonight over the Devil Rays, 14-5. It was a team-effort with contributions from everyone. Even the lady in the stands behind the plate with the low-cut pink-sequin top contributed by providing constant incentive for the guys to go back to the batter's box.

That's so very awesome, but it's too many darn runs for me to recap and get to bed at a reasonable hour. Instead, here's my list of somewhat related thoughts that were, if not actually about the game, at least pondered during the game.

Luke Hudson
He looks really freakin' good. And by that I mean that he's an attractive fellow, not that he pitched all that great. He wasn't awful or anything: Hudson gave up 5 runs on 3 hits and enjoyed a 6 run lead by the time he left the game after 6 innings. Considering that it was his first start of the season after that ass-long trip to the DL, I don't see any reason to complain. So far, at least he seems to improve the overall quality of the rotation.

Hudson also got on base twice tonight where we got a really clear view of the batting helmet that looked about two sizes too small. He must have grown since last season.

Adam Dunn
I was chilled to read the quote from a Dayton Daily News story in this post at Redleg Nation saying that the Danny Graves' spring training jersey that Dunn had hung up on the wall had mysteriously disappeared from the clubhouse during their roadtrip.

OK, getting rid of the chairs was one thing: they symbolized frivolity in a clubhouse that needed to be reminded to focus on business. But there was nothing frivolous about the 32 on the wall. The players wanted to remember Graves, and the management should want them to remember him, too, or at least the example they made of him.

I can't come up with a reason that anyone would take this jersey with what I know. Leading theories include:

1. Dunn is a discipline problem that we haven't heard about from the media and taking down the shirt was an effort to break his defiant will.
2. Dunn hasn't be doing so hot lately and taking down the shirt was punitive.
3. Graves asked for it back and everyone forgot to tell Dunn.
4. Someone's going to make a fortune with it on eBay.
5. The shirt was so embarassed to be associated with a team that got swept by the Rockies that it pulled itself off the wall and wandered off.
6. (By far, the most likely of all) Something that I haven't thought of because I don't have enough information or understanding.

No matter what the reason, the whole thing gave me an ooky feeling that I still have not shook. On the other hand, the Reds have won three games since the shirt came down. Maybe we should take away all of their shirts. I could get on board with that.

Gold Star Chili Reds Wrap
On April 29, I posted this screenshot from the intro to the Gold Star Chili Reds Wrap. Obviously from the video but less obviously from the still shot, the player was Barry Larkin and his jersey number had been digitally removed. On tonight's edition of the Reds Wrap, I noticed that the clip of the player in question has been removed entirely from the leader. So my screenshot is the only evidence that it ever existed.

Should that post suddenly go missing and RHM fall eerily silent, be afraid!

On to Bigger and Better Things
A tidy sweep of one of the worst teams in baseball neatly completed, it's time to try our luck with Baltimore. I hope we get to see Sammy Sosa stand next to Wily Mo Peña for comparison purposes. I think we have the better side.

Go Reds!