May 18, 2006
Save Tiny Casey
For those of you just joining us…
Last Sunday, Tiny Casey was kidnapped. The kidnapper remains at large, and our tiny little plastic buddy remains missing.
Jacci identified JD, Shawn, Blade, Doc Scott, and me as her suspects.
- JD says he couldn't have done it because he was watching something on t.v.
- Shawn says he couldn't have done it because he was at a children's movie.
- Blade says he couldn't have done it because he was reading a children's book.
- Scott says he couldn't have done it because he was getting a special deal on an extra-large helping of salmonella.
- And I couldn't have done it because I spent Sunday watching the Indianapolis Indians trounce the Durham Bulls, 8-1. Well, not so much “watching” as “drinking beer in the general vicinity of.” Mother's Day fun at its finest.
Someone's story must not hold up, because Casey is gone.
Furthermore, the kidnapper sent clues to T.C.'s whereabouts:
- Monday's clue featured some rather unusual capitalization. That would turn out to be a trend in the letters.
- Tuesday's clue explained that Casey could be found at a URL, but you'll have to figure out the domain. Wherever could we find the letters that make up the missing word??
- Wednesday's clue didn't have a letter, but the photo was notable.
- Today's clue warns that time is running short for T.C.
I'm really worried. You have to help Jacci find Tiny Casey. The first person to locate him and identify his kidnapper will receive a full prize package from yours truly, including an autographed copy of Covering the Bases, several matchbooks, and an autographed copy of the increasingly collectible book Funnyball.
Star Wars isn’t a children’s book.
My guess is that it’s Red Hot Mama. Girls play with dolls.
I bet that dressing up in Star Wars costumes isn’t for children, either. How the Hell were you reading that book anyway? It hasn’t even come out yet!
Don’t hate on Star Wars, man. You’ll get lightsabered.
Strike me down now and I will rise again even more powerful.