Dammit, Jerry, you can't start planning who's going to pitch in the tenth inning until you get through the ninth. Extra innings don't matter a lick if you don't last through regulation.

That's right: the winner of this game will be awarded a…nevermind. Cards wouldn't have any use for them anyway.

They've actually got me doing work today, but I'll be in to say snarky things in between edits.

Go Reds!

Cornroyo's number of failed attempts at win number ten now outnumber his number of wins. Can he keep the streak going? We're all riveted to our televisions to find out!

All of us except my smack talking partner. But I wanted to put up a smack talking post anyway for anyone who comes by wanting to try to convince me that Eckstein isn't actually a rodent.

So, I hear we've picked up a new lefty reliever in Scott Schoeneweis. He comes to us from Toronto in exchange for a player to be named later or cash.

Schoeneweis brings with him a 2-2 record, 6.51 ERA, and the most friggin difficult name to type of the whole season. The deal for the two remaining lefty relievers who haven't yet played for the Reds this season is expected tomorrow.

Kent Mercker was moved from the 15-day DL to the 60-day DL en route to the infinity-day DL. Love Shackelford was optioned back to Louisville; that guy must be able to identify every match.com member between Cincy and Louisville by the sound of her footsteps by now.

I just heard on The Hot List on ESPN that both of Ken Griffey, Jr.'s parents have cancer. His father has early-stage prostate cancer and his mother is soon to undergo surgery for colon cancer.

Best wishes to all the Griffeys: a big collective Get Well Soon from RHM.