Before Wayne Krivsky had a chance to make the horrible mistake of re-signing Royce Clayton, the Blue Jays beat him to the punch. Marc says:

Ken Rosenthal reports the Blue Jays have agreed to a one-year, $1.5 million deal with Royce Clayton.

This is the exact transcript of the conversation that ensued here in the office between me and the Crack Technical Staff regarding this story:

CTS: Clayton signed!
RHM: With whom?
CTS: The Blue Jays. $1.5 million.
RHM: Royce Clayton commands $1.5 million?
CTS: Sure. In Canada.

To be paid in maple syrup and snow.

As in in direct response to me making fun of their inactivity and certainly not because they were just wrapping up the details, the Cardinals have finally gone and done something:

Adam Kennedy signed a three-year deal on Tuesday to play second base for St. Louis, reuniting him with Eckstein, his old Anaheim teammate.
….
The Cardinals also filled another of the openings on their roster on Tuesday, signing right-hander Kip Wells to take one of the vacant spots in their starting rotation. Wells, 29, was most recently a Texas Ranger but is best known to the Cardinals from four-plus years pitching for the Pittsburgh Pirates.

Wells, a previously good starter down on his luck, going for $4 million. What a shame that he can't catch, or we'd be looking at him in a Cincinnati uniform.

From an e-mail from THE Dave Storm, GABP scoreboard operator extraordinaire and front-man for the Screaming Mimes:

Hoo-ya Screaming Mimes fans… hopefully all of your Thanksgiving leftovers have been consumed and you're hopelessly optimistic Amazon Christmas Wish List is updated… now on to more important things.

Redsfest is THIS FRIDAY & SATURDAY December 1st & 2nd. We play the really big show Friday at 8:00 PM. And now you can win 4 tickets to Friday's Redsfest - which means free access to the concert!

Announcing the Screaming Mimes Redsfest Ticket Giveaway Contest Extravaganza! (cue trumpet sting)

To enter, email us at dave@screamingmimes.com with a really clever limerick, drawing, picture, song, animation - anything that can be emailed - with some reference, either obvious or discreet, to Screaming Mimes by Wednesday the 29th at Midnight. Judging will take place Thursday and you will be contacted immediately to get your 4 tickets for Friday's Redsfest. Please include your phone number and email addresses with the entry. The winning entry will be posted on screamingmimes.com and myspace.com/screamingmimes, along with some of the runners-up that really amuse us.

To find out exactly what's happening with Redsfest, check out www.reds.com/redsfest - all the players, interactives, games, music, etc…

If you haven't checked out www.screamingmimes.com yet, GO THERE NOW and download our FREE GIFT to you - and mp3 of our spunky song “Christmastime”. We only ask that you share it with everyone you can and help spread the love… just use proper protection when you spread love.

See you Friday!!!!

Hey, four tickets to Friday's Redsfest is a $40 value. Plus, the honor and glory of the winner coming from RHM is something I'd cherish for at least a couple weeks.

Heh heh. That's what she said.

Actually, I think that the Crack Technical Staff and I manage to ramble on for an impressive amount of time, when you consider how sparse our list of topics is:

• The Reds spring training schedule is now available. It hasn't even snowed yet, and I'm already pining for spring training.
• The Astros signed Carlos Lee to a 6-year, $100 million deal.
• The Brewers participated in a six-player trade with Arizona.
• The Reds sent Jason LaRue and $3 million to Kansas City, just to turn around and sign another catcher.
• The Cardinals signed Randy Kiesler to a split contract. Now they'll win for sure!
• Jerry Narron, Bronson Arroyo, and Ryan Freel are up for This Year In Baseball Awards. One of these three is not like the others.
• Derek Jeter gets hot and heavy in a museum. Crowd reaction: Jeter goes to museums?

Episode 33: It's Just Not That Long (15.2 MB, 22:09)

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

No, really. I read it on Marc's blog:

Lo and behold, the Reds have signed veteran backstop Chad Moeller, who spent last year in the Brewers organization, to a one-year contract. Not sure what this means in the grand scheme just yet, as Moeller appeared in just 31 big-league games last year, but I'm sure it's all part of the master plan.

Marc asks Kriv-dawg to explain:

“You need depth,” said Krivsky. “You need a team. You need guys with roles. You just can’t go with two catchers – you’d better have depth there. If someone gets hurt, a foul tip, you’re out there scrambling. You’d better have some depth at that position. That’s what we’re doing here.”

And Moeller's .184 average in 29 games with the Brewers last year?

“He’s better than that,” said Krivsky.

Now, before you get all excited, I should point out that “you just can't go with two catchers” IS actually an appropriate sentiment in some cases. For example, if a person were to walk up to you and ask, “What's the absolute minimum number of baseball players needed to form a proper human pyramid?” or “I don't want company, I want a crowd. What do I need?”