Have you ever wondered what Adam Dunn would look like in a blue jersey with an ice cream cone on the breast? Ever needed an excuse to make crude comments about his “drumstick”? Ever longed for the opportunity to buy a bunch of ice cream so save up your proofs of purchase for a miniature bat that doesn't even have his name on it?

If so, head to your local purveyor of frozen dairy confections, my friend, for a treat that will tantalize your taste buds, cool your lips, and trigger your anaphylaxis (if you're allergic to peanuts).

Thanks to BubbaFan for the tip:

The Bats' last game is over (Bats won, 8-2) so the Sept. callups were announced:

Todd Coffey, RP
Kirk Saarloos, RP
Brad Salmon, RP
Buck Coats, OF
Ryan Hanigan, C
Joey Votto, 1B

May they make all the difference.

Welcome baseball fans. You're reading the holiday ramblings of a woman too lazy to haul her ass out to Victory Field to see the Bats' last game of the season against the Indians. Hey, this is the day for the workers, and that's me. I've got to take a break from sitting in front of a computer at work to sit in front of a computer at home while the Reds play.

Lovin' this game so far, by the way. Reds up by two in the bottom of the first. Brandon Phillips in posession of 26 steals to go with his 26 homers. And Josh Hamilton was totally under the tag. Great friggin' day.

Go Reds!

This has been an ugly series so far, but you know things are looking up when Brandon Phillips is vowing to turn a double-play straight through Pujols' head.

My kiddo is suffering a fever and a tummyache today, so there's always the nonzero chance that we'll be doing the obligatory appendicitis-scare ER trip, but I'm hopeful that ibuprofen and Popsicles will do the trick.

Let's see if C. Trent's got the line-ups:

Our Beloved Reds
Josh Hamilton CF
Jeff Keppinger SS
Ken Griffey Jr. RF
Brandon Phillips 2B
Adam Dunn LF
Scott Hatteberg 1B
Edwin Encarnación 3B
David Ross C
Bronson Arroyo P

Those Damn Cardinals
Eckstein ss
Ankiel rf
Ludwick lf
Edmonds cf
Duncan 1b
Miles 2b
Bennett c
Looper p
Ryan 3b

No Pujols! I guess the threat of someone throwing at your cranium is a strong one.