Holy crap, did Arroyo really get his first win last night? It’s like we slipped into an alternate dimension or something.

Wait, this is supposed to be smack talk about the Cardinals. Allow me to start over:

Holy crap, are the Cardinals really trying to pass of Chris Duncan as an outfielder? What would the ghost of Jim Edmonds say?

Your Cincinnati Reds
Corey Patterson
Jeff Keppinger
Ken Griffey, Jr
Brandon Phillips
Adam Dunn
Edwin Encarnacion
Joey Votto
Paul Bako
Johnny Cueto

Their St. Louis Cardinals
Schumaker
Kenney
Pujols
Ankiel
Glaus
Duncan
Molina
Pineiro
Izturis

In this episode of MLB Roundup:

• Tim Dierkes of MLBTradeRumors.com examines a few pitchers who may be had prior to the trade deadline
• Reporter Michael Barnett looks at Koji Uehara, who may be next season’s big-name import
• Plus a look at the best deal in baseball, Two-Dollar-Wednesday at the Oakland Coliseum

Life and work have been a bit busy for game wraps the last few days, so why don’t we take a look at the standings since the weekend?

The Cubbies continue reside in first place, although they have definitely cooled off from the awesome hot streak that swept them into first. I mean, they lost a series to the Nationals. That’s gotta hurt. And all that without the hoppy Alfonso Soriano. He’ll be coming off the DL soon, so it should be interesting to see if he helps or hurts the team. If he continues to insist on his ridiculous idea of leading off, it’ll hurt.

The Cardinals are holding onto second place, despite losing to the Reds last night. (Even a blind squirrel like Bronson Arroyo can find a nut once in a while.) They did take a series from Houston over the weekend to continue their surprising start. Odds are good they’re winning ways will continue against the Reds, despite the opening game’s result. The Cardinals just win, and the Reds, and Dusty Baker, don’t.

In third place are the Brewers. They’re struggling along right now, losing their weekend series to the Marlins. However, Mike Cameron’s back from his drug suspension, so things should be looking up. Plus, they play the Cubs starting today, which provides ample opportunity to change their fortune.

The Astros and the Reds are tied for fourth place. The Astros got their thanks to a 6-game winning streak last week, including a sweep of the Reds, although they faltered against the Cardinals and the Diamondbacks. The Reds have a modest 3-game winning streak that’s lifted them from last place. Way to ride that general manager firing!

Bringing up the rear, of course, are the Pirates. They made big news by releasing former Cardinal Matt Morris at the end of last week. The team continues to lose a lot and abuse the good pitchers they do have. There really aren’t any better options than Morris in the minors for Pittsburgh, so I don’t know that the move will actually improve things. It’s looking like a 100-loss year is possible.

Is there a better day in the season than the first game between the Reds and the Cardinals.

Well, yeah, maybe. But I’m just feeling very enthusiastic today. 😀

Here’s the line-ups:

Da Reds
Corey Patterson, CF
Jeff Keppinger, SS
Ken Griffey Jr, RF
Brandon Phillips, 2B
Adam Dunn, LF
Edwin Encarnaci&oactue;n, 3B
Joey Votto, 1B
Paul Bako, C
Bronson Arroyo, RHP

Da Cards
Ryan Ludwick, RF
Rick Ankiel, CF
Alber Pujols, 1B
Chris Duncan, LF
Troy Glaus, 3B
Yadi Molina, C
Adam Kennedy, 2B
Todd Wellemeyer, P
Cesar Izturis, SS

It does my heart good to see that someone continues trying to hit the pitcher in the 8 hole. Of course, since they’re going up against Arroyo, it’ll probably work.

Unlike many baseball fans, I have not been following the sport my entire life. My fandom has not been passed down through the generations. I have no heart-warming memories of afternoons at the ballpark while my father drank beer and shouted profanities at the umpires.

Quite the opposite, in fact: I couldn’t have told you the difference between the AL and the NL until I was 22, my family was primarily peopled with hippies who couldn’t have conceived of the loss of identity that would have come with donning a uni, and my father rarely drank anything at all, unless you count wheat juice and linseed oil.

But when Griffey came to Cincinnati in 2000, my husband’s long-dormant baseball fanatic re-emerged and soon I found myself a regular attendee at baseball games. I had a lot to learn, such as the rules of the game, and I depended on my Crack Baseball-Rules Staff to get me through. Fortunately for me, Jonny was a relatively patient co-game-attendee and helped me get up to speed on the basics.

However, I took notice of other baseball newbies in the stands–mostly women–who also were counting on their significant others to help them learn the game, usually with much more condescension and annoyance. And at the office, I saw women unable to participate in the water-cooler sports talk because they didn’t have the requisite knowledge to come up with something witty.

Enter Red Hot Mama. After her primary goal of getting my sense of humor back (a horrible job had me to the brink of chronic wet-blanket-hood) was another goal of serving the community of would-be female fans. Don’t know Adam Dunn from Adam? Check out the Human League. Need a quick summary of last night’s game? Read the Game Wraps. Want something smart-alecky to say when the Angels fan in your office keeps complaining that all the other California teams get all the media attention? I recommend, “Maybe they should try changing their name.”

Which is why I’m pleased to be listed among the informational sports blogs by women in The Sports Diva Magazine. Go girls!