I’m not sure whether the newly renamed Bellyitcher is going to drop by, but either way, we can say smackish things about the Cardinals.

Of course, the Cardinals failure to get the memo on their own suckitude is hardly the story of today. Not only is the home crowd welcoming back their 600 home run hero (which means he can be traded to Seattle now, right?), but it’s also Joe Nuxhall night. The Hall of Fame broadcaster and youngest player in the modern era passed away during the off-season. To celebrate his contribution to the Reds and the Cincinnati culture in general, the city has actually changed the address of the stadium to 100 Joe Nuxhall Way.

Pretty cool.

In other news, this guy is the fellas the Cardinals are running out on the mound.

Tee hee.

Boxscore

The past week or so has seen an increase in the benches clearing in baseball. And I, for one, say it’s about time. I find it highly entertaining to see all these millionaire athletes doing their best WWF wrestler impersonations. I don’t know why baseball has cracked down so hard on these over the years. I mean, hardly anyone ever gets hurt.

At any rate, the Pirates and Diamondbacks didn’t have a brawl, but they did all leave their dugouts after Randy Johnson and Doug Mientkiewicz yelled at each other. Mientkiewicz apparently had the gall, the gall, to ask for time. A little thing, really, but it rattled Johnson, who had been cruising to that point. And based on that, the Pirates pushed a run across to take the lead and never really looked back.

The Pirates are two games under .500 and have an excellent chance at getting to or above it when the Nationals come to town. Tim Redding starts against Paul Maholm at 7:10pm EDT.

Boxscore

It was Edinson Volquez’s worst start of the year–although it still counts as a “quality start.” Of course, that didn’t matter. The Reds were loose and happy; they knew they were going to win. It’s not like Harang was pitching and they had to buckle down to score some runs.

Of course, it helped that Griffey started off things with his momentous 7th home run of the season. Then Paul Bako, of all people, had a two-run home run game. Those 2 homers represent 10% of his career home run total, by the way.

It wasn’t all good news for the Reds, though. Jerry Hairston, Jr. broke his thumb sliding head-first into second base. Let that be a lesson to you kids: Thumbs are weaker than cleats!

It looks like the shortstop position this year is just like the Spinal Tap drummer. First, Alex Gonzalez, then Jeff Keppinger, and now Hairston. I’d be nervous if I were Paul Janish.

Today, the Reds return home to face the Cardinals. Mitchell Boggs, he of the ridiculous MLB.com image, battles Homer Bailey at 7:10pm EDT.