If you’re setting up a little one for a lifetime of disappointment as a Reds fan, you should definitely sign them up to participate in the Reds Heads. For $20, you get:

• Exclusive members-only experiences at Great American Ball Park
• Four FREE ticket vouchers to select Reds home games for club member
• Exclusive members-only gear: club jersey, baseball cap, drawstring Jay Bruce replica jersey backpack and wristbands
• Membership card with lanyard
• Reds Heads temporary tattoo
• Exclusive Reds Heads Newsletters
• FREE ticket to the Cincinnati Reds Hall of Fame
• FREE kids meal at Bob Evans Restaurant
• FREE one-day admission to the Cincinnati Zoo & Botanical Garden

Many of these items do come with catches. You can’t send your kid in to the Hall of Fame alone, for example, and while you’re there, you might as well buy a year-long pass because one of the “experiences” is likely to require that of you later. Also, the “experiences” are never on dates that the ticket vouchers are good for, so if you are from out of state and were hoping to be able to leverage as many of your club perks as possible, you’re going to be out more gas than you expected.

Even so, it’s probably worth $20 for the shirt and backpack.

And if you act quickly, you can be among the first 1,000 fans at Redsfest to join up and thereby get the illustrious “Reds Heads limited-edition merchandise item,” as in, “mommy, mommy, take me to the store now for the latest limited-edition merchandise item!”