George Grande, the squeaky-clean, impeccably tanned play-by-play guy for the Cincinnati Reds has called it quits:

“I wanted to spend more time at home, basically,” Grande said before Sunday’s game. “I love the Reds, what I do and I love my job. I just need to be home on a regular basis, not just four or five days a month, to keep up on things.”

I’m just glad he got a chance to see the Cardinals win it all before retiring.

In George’s honor, tonight we revisit the Georginator 6000 XL.

You may need to upgrade Flash to play the Georginator 6000 XL. Get the latest version here. Countless thanks to my crack technical staff, who created the Georginator 6000 XL essentially all by himself.

Use the Georginator 6000 XL.

Here’s a panoramic shot of Wrigley Field during its final game of the 2009 baseball season. Check out those blocked sight-lines! Click to embiggen.

The Red Hot Family is taking of for Chicago this morning, the cubs and the diamondbacks for to see. At the zoo. Then we’ll see the Cubs and the Diamondbacks play tomorrow.

Pictures tomorrow if we stay up that late, else early next week. Wish us luck with the traffic!

The Reds fired Dick Pole today, adding another coach to the list of those whose tenure is shorter than Red Hot Mama’s. Though I’m sure we would have been dismissed by Jerry Narron if he’d had his druthers.

Reds GM Walt Jocketty was so shook up, he couldn’t find the direction of his sentence:

I think as an organization that Dick has done a good job.

Dick Pole is an organization?

At this point going forward, we’re making a change and we’ll leave it at that. There are no specific reasons. We really don’t have a clear candidate [as a replacement]. We’re going to formulate a list and try and find the right guy that can be with this organization a long time. We’ve got some young pitchers coming along. We want to make sure we find the right guy to help develop them.

So basically you don’t know who you want doing the job, but you sure as hell don’t want Pole. Fair enough: he wasn’t exactly doing the job as it was, what with Mario Soto talking Volquez and Cueto and Homer Bailey’s old school coach on the scene. That’s most of the rotation: Aaron Harang doesn’t need much coaching anyway, and Bronson Arroyo is too hopped up on kava kava and green tea to listen to anyone.

I guess that does leave Kip Wells. I’ll give him credit for Kip Wells.

Whatever they have in mind for the long-term, I like the trend. Perhaps there’s another former Cubs coach whose employment in Cincinnati should be reconsidered.

The Cardinals have been blown out by the Reds for two games in a row, but it’s not their fault. Certainly it has nothing to do with the malaise of clinching the division, the fact that they’ve been resting their players, or even the fact that the Reds are on a freakin’ tear right now. John Smoltz being old is irrelevant.

No, nothing to do with those things. It’s all Bronson Arroyo’s fault.

Now, I enjoy insulting Arroyo as much as the next Red-blooded American, but Dave Duncan couldn’t limit it to potshots about his hair, shitty guitar playing, or supplement usage. Oh no, he went as far as making irresponsible, unproven accusations that Arroyo was breaking the rules.

“I’m sure he had pine tar on his cap,” Duncan told the St. Louis Post-Dispatch. “He didn’t have any problem getting a grip. Balls like that can generate a lot more movement than a slick ball that hasn’t been rubbed up.”

And what proof did he have? Dick Pole speaks the truth:

“He shouldn’t make wild accusations like that,” Pole said. “If they suspected that last night, why didn’t they check him? They would find nothing. The balls [Smoltz] were throwing out looked fine to me.”

Finally, mark this moment in this history books my friends, because it’s the first time that Dusty Baker has said something I agree with:

“if anybody should know, it would be Duncan,” Baker said. “I remember they had Julian Tavarez over there. They threw his hat out, remember that? His hat was all messed up. They also had a left-hander, Steve Kline. It’s not like it’s something new.”

Read Mark’s whole story here.