Forget about his pitching, I am talkin’ about that funky hair-do!
That, dear reader, is the stuff of legends.

The hilarious hair along with his cherubic face might not win him a “Hottest Baller Award”, but it certainly qualifies him for “player most resembling a cartoon character.”

On a serious note: we find out today via an article by John Fay that Volquez met with Mario Soto literally a week after he was traded to the Reds. You might recall how I anticipated this obvious mentorship in the very first paragraph of my 2007 Year in Review. That’s right, you get nothing but top notch reporting and predictions here at Red-Hot-Mama, so stay tuned as the games officially kick off in less than 48 hours!

What, you were expecting someone other than Bud Selig?

Despite saying repeatedly that he would retire after 2009, Selig accepted the offer of a 3-year contract extension.

The man who courageously lead baseball into its steroid mess will also be the one to blindly lead it out. This time he’s got just four years to do it, unless he accepts another extension in 2012, which he’s assured everyone he won’t. Just like in 2006.

Everyone knows that when you’re negotiating a salary for a new position that you ask your potential employer to give you less money than they’re offering. I mean, I bet there’s hardly a job offer interaction that goes down in this country where the employee doesn’t say, “hey, I might mess up at the deadline, and then how would I ever deal with the guilt of that salary?”

I mean, I know I’ve asked, even begged, for a reduction in pay. I bet you have, too. Isn’t it time that A-Rod took a lesson from people like us?

Great news! General Manager Wayne Krivsky has fixed the Reds! Everything is going to be OK now. As of yesterday, he traded injured almost-major-league outfielder Chris Denorfia to Oakland for two players to be named later and cash.

Chris Denorfia was, after all, what was holding the team back. That Minor League Player of the Year award was just hanging over everyone's head.

And what's better is what he got in return. Two players to be named later and cash. You know they've got to be hot commodities if it only takes two of them to be worth one injured Chris Denorfia. To put that in perspective, it would take, like 6 Gary Majewskis to be worth that. Plus cash!

Reportedly, Billy Beane had been asking after Denorfia since spring training, so clearly, he really wanted him. It's such a relief that Krivsky is dealing with Oakland this time around instead of, say, Washington. Because if there's one person in this sport with less of a reputation for getting the better of the people he trades with, it's Beane.

Some might argue that it's just a coincidence that this deal is going down now, but I think that the timing is the very best part of this move. When faced with a manager who can't manage, an offense that can't score, and a bullpen with more runs than a bout of salmonella, it takes a brave man to make the bold move of trading a hopeful young franchise player who was recovering from surgery.

So kudos to you, Kriv-dawg. I'm sure the Reds will start winning any day now.